Perhaps the ultimate motivator in human behavior is the drive towards self-actualization. A self-actualized person is one who embraces the essence of life and Loves fully to one’s potential. To reach the attainment of self-actualization, it seems to me that one needs to engage in Self-Love. In fact, to Love another, to become fully involved in positive growth producing relationships, the Love of oneself must be present. This idea starts from early in childhood. It is a process that unfolds as one develops. One of the most essential components in human development is the Need to Belong. What socioeconomic factors need to be present for this necessary attachment to occur? What happens if these conditions are not present? Will not the person develop negatively skewed ideas of relationships especially those involved with intimacy? How can one Love oneself when the Love experienced has been rife with a culture of violence? Can we develop a deeper understanding of one’s psyche by looking into his/her background?
After you have completely read Perforated Fiber, write an essay:
1. Outline what you think are the developmental milestones necessary to achieving Self-Love;
2. Relate these milestones to the authors. What was missing in their lives that lead to the paths they chose? (In this section make specific references
to Perforated Fiber. All you have to do when using examples from this source is to list the page number);
3. Define self-actualization (in this section be sure to include your ideas of parental Love, relationship Love and Self-Love).
4. When you list milestones, make sure you include specific references to early childhood;
5. Include learning concepts as referenced in this study guide.
I want you to think about how the authors of the autobiography and their two siblings were raised. Yet each turned out differently. Ervin commits a heinous crime and is in prison for the rest of his life. Serena gets involved with drugs, becomes pregnant and dies in an automobile crash at the age of sixteen. Haven kills his mother’s abusive boyfriend and spends ten years in prison and has rehabilitated himself through achieving two Master degrees. Maurice avoided the drugs and violence of his siblings and has become a very successful businessman. Even though all had the same mother and were raised in violence, perhaps, each experienced life differently that led to taking different life roads. For example, Maurice had a grandmother that gave him a sense of belonging and a male mentor when he was in high school. Ervin had absolutely no one unto which he could develop an attachment. Although, Haven’s grandfather taught him about stealing bootlegging and prostituting – he was, at least, present for him. So, in essence, what I am asking you is to look deep into each’s lives and see if you can make any conclusions about milestones they may have experienced that led him to the choices they made.
Secondly, I want you to define Love. What does it mean to be a Loving person? How does one achieve Love? Does this start with the parent(s)? If attachment does not occur, esp. in the first year of life, will this have a lifelong result? If the parent is unavailable to the child, how does the child make-up for this? In the case of the persons in the book, the fact they did not have a positive father role model, did this have negative consequences? Much has been written about the role of the mother. However, how much effect, if any, does the father (or the absence of a father) have on development? Is this just necessary for the son or does the daughter also need to experience a Loving father?
In writing this, may be helpful to look at your own background. What factors influenced you? What milestones were you exposed to that led you to be you? If you were raised in the same environment as the authors, would you have turned out the same?
Is Love important to healthy development? I mean is it not true that we all are seeking to be Loved and to give Love? If there are barriers to either giving or receiving Love, will we not development self-destructive behaviors, e.g. depression, cutting, suicidal thoughts, violent responses? If a person is in desperate need of Love may s/he get involved in an abusive relationship, because this is better than being alone? If one watches domestic violence might s/he confuse this to what relationships are about?
I hope the above helps you in assessing what I want you to write about – I want you to be creative as you can. I am curious about how you perceive relationships – parental, friendship, romance. There are, of course, no right or wrong responses. I guess, in essence, I am, on some level, asking you about what drives you, what motivates you to be who you are.
I am not particular interested in your grammatical skills as I am in the ability to analyze the factors that are important in leading a productive life. I am also interested in your ability to critically think as you analyze the authors of Perforated Fiber.
Since is a critical thinking essay, there are no right or wrong ideas. What is important is how you develop your hypotheses. The grade will be based on the evidence presented to the positions you take as to developmental milestones and their effect on the human psyche. The essay needs to be word-processed (12 font) and double-spaced. Length requirement: 5-7 pages.
