The purpose of this paper is for you to analyze a specific conflict you have had or continue to have with a specific person. Your relationship with this person may be ongoing or in the past. You must incorporate the course’s concepts and terminology from the text in your analysis and self-reflection.
This assignment sheet should include questions for you to consider as you write about the nature of your conflict, the role of power, individual styles, assessment, personal intervention, prevention, and possible solutions to your conflict. You may not need to answer every question in each section. Write your analysis in paragraphs and not as short answers to each question. The questions are to help you frame your analysis.
A suggestion for the paper would be to use subheadings. Examples might include: Introduction, Nature of the Conflict, Power Dynamics, Assessment of the Conflict, Interventions, Solutions, Preventions, etc (and a section for Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the final draft)
Questions to consider, may not need to answer all of them.
II. Nature of the Conflict
When did the conflict start? What caused it? Was it a series of events or just one event?
When did the conflict originate? Why did it occur?
Use a metaphor to describe your conflict.
Has the nature of this conflict changed over time? If so, how?
How do you feel about the conflict?
How do you think the other person feels about the conflict?
How does the other person feel about your feelings on the conflict?
How do you think the other person feels about you?
What would you like to accomplish from this conflict?
How would you like to see it resolved? What are your goals?
What do you feel the other person thinks your goals are?
Do (did) you interfere (current or past) with what you think the other person’s goals are? If so, how?
Does (did) the other person interfere (current or past) with your goals? If so, how?
Has the other person done so in the past?
Does the other person realize that you are interfering with his or her goals?
Have you noticed that your goals have changed since the beginning of the conflict?
Do you feel that the other person’s goals have changed since the beginning of the conflict?
Are there other people who have become involved in your conflict? Do these people feel that they need to take sides in this dispute? How did they influence your decisions and behaviors?
Has this conflict become a destructive conflict? Does it waver between a constructive conflict and a destructive conflict, or does it only follow one type of conflict exclusively? Has it always been this way?
III. Power
How much power do you feel you have?
How much power does the other person feel they have?
Do you think that the other person has more power than you? Why, or why not?
How do you feel that the other person views your power?
How do you think your power affects the conflict?
How do you think that the other person’s power affects your relationship with him or her?
What qualities do you feel you have that the other person values?
What qualities do you value about the other person?
Has this conflict considerably altered your daily life with the other person? If so, how?
Do you think that the other person will agree with you on who has the most power in your relationship?
What do you depend on the other person for?
What does the other person depend on you for?
Do you think that the other person threatens you? Do you think that you threaten the other person?
Between you and the other person in the conflict, who do you think has the most power?
Whom does the other person think has the most power?
IV. Styles
What specific choices do you make in the conflict?
What individual conflict styles do you use?
Avoidance: You minimize an open discussion of the conflict.
Domination: One person wins, and the other person loses.
Compromise: You and the other person give something up to reach an agreement.
Integration: You work together to find solutions that benefit each other.
Obliging: You avoid asserting your own needs and prefer to cooperate with the other person.
Does your conflict style vary with the situation? Why? How?
What is the other person’s style of conflict?
Avoidance: The other person minimizes an open discussion of the conflict.
Domination: One person wins, and the other person loses.
Compromise: The other person and you give something up to reach an agreement.
Integration: The other person and you work together to find solutions that benefit each other.
Obliging: The other person avoids asserting their own needs and prefers to cooperate.
Does the other person’s conflict style vary? Why? How?
What conflict management tactics does the other person use?
What do you or the other person do to keep the conflict going?
Do you or the other person suggest solutions? If so, what are they? Are the solutions followed through? How? Why, or why not?
What nonverbal behavior do you notice in the other person during a conflict?
If you do notice a behavior change, does that influence your conflict style?
Do you preplan your choice of words and actions during a conflict, or are you more spontaneous?
Do you feel that the other person preplans their word or actions?
Do you or your partner ever start conflicts deliberately? How, and why?
How will you handle the conflict if it is not resolved?
Is there anything that you’d like to say or do but haven’t? Why, or why not?
V. Assessment
Is the conflict repetitive? If so, how? How much time have you both spent trying to solve the conflict?
Did you think that the conflict could be transformed?
What would you like to see happen?
Did you try to change your behavior in any way? Who or what influenced this?
Did the other person change his or her behavior in any way? Who or what influenced this? Why do you think this happened?
Do your conflicts ever carry over into other aspects of your life? In what ways?
Does this dispute carry over into other aspects of the other person’s life?
Are other members of your household ever drawn into your conflicts? How? How do they feel about this?
Has there ever been a conflict that has not been resolved in the earlier stages of the relationship? Why not? What was its impact?
What differences have you noticed in the other person since your conflict?
What differences in yourself have you noticed since your conflict began?
How would you like to see your conflict resolved? Do you think it will be resolved this way?
What do you think will happen to the relationship in the future?
VI. Personal Intervention
How do you express your anger?
How does the other person express his or her anger?
What are some ways in which you can manage your anger in a better way (i.e. alternatives)?
What are some ways in which the other person can manage his or her anger in a better way?
What other changes, if any, would you like to make in your behavior? What would you like to change about the other person’s behavior?
Do you feel comfortable saying how you really feel with the other person? Do you share your true feelings with the other person? Does the other person share their true feelings with you?
VII. Solutions
How could the situation have been handled better?
Have attempted solutions become part of the problem? How? Why, or why not?
Can you think of any solutions that have not been tried? Would you like to try any of these? What additional resources might you need?
What do you think will be the long-term relationship between you and the other person?
Do you believe that there is something you could do to resolve this? What is it? How would you go about it? Would it make you happy to do this?
Do you believe that there is a way you could reach a compromise? Collaborate? What would you perceive to be a win–win situation?
In what ways do you attempt to control and alleviate this conflict?
In what ways does the other person attempt to control and alleviate this conflict?
Are you satisfied with the current outcome of the conflict, or do you wish a better solution could be found?
VIII. Prevention
Do you think that this conflict could have been prevented? If so, how?
How could you prevent any future conflicts with the other person?
Would a third party be helpful in mediating your conflict with the other person, or has a third party been helpful in resolving your conflict with the other person?
What relationship and identity issues do you have in this conflict? Are they similar to the issues that you have in conflicts with other people? How might you address these issues?
What communication skills might help you be better at managing conflicts in the future?
APA format, Times New Roman 12pt, double spaced. Minimum of 3 sources, with a minimum of 2 scholarly sources
