Session Three Overview
Assignments Due for Session Three
1. Read Interpersonal Communication chapters 3-4
2. Complete Exercise 2
3. Complete the assignments that correlate with the reading.
Session Two Documents
Read each of the assigned chapters in Interpersonal Communication and Bridges Not Walls. Then, answer the following questions with thorough explanations. Each question should, on average, take 1 – 2 pages to answer with a final page count of no more than 8 double-spaced pages. Don’t hesitate to do additional reading outside of the two texts if you need more clarity on the concepts discussed. If you do consult other works, be sure to correctly cite these sources in your reference page along with the two main texts for the course.
Complete Exercise 2
Interpersonal Communication – Chapter 3
In this assignment, you will be exploring how perception affects your approach to communication. First, think of a recent situation where you met someone for the first time and your initial impression of them was negative.
Describe the situation and what actually occurred that left you with a negative impression. In a second paragraph, explain which of the seven theories (see page 75) best describes how you arrived at your negative assessment of this person. Illustrate how you unconsciously applied the theory. In the third paragraph, create a fictional scenario about the person you discussed in the opening paragraph that gives some potential background information that might explain why this person looked or acted the way they did to prompt a negative impression. For example, say the person was rude to you and that is why he/she left you with a negative initial impression. In your fictional background you might say that they just came from the funeral of their spouse who died suddenly from a tragic accident. You didn’t know that when you encountered them. You were simply the recipient of their rude behavior. In a fourth paragraph, explain how knowing that information (if it were true; but you are making this up) might have changed your perception of this person and the way you might have interacted with them in that initial encounter. In a fifth and final paragraph, explain how, as Christians, we can respond differently to difficult people we encounter if we keep that cause-and-effect background in mind as we interact with them?
Interpersonal Communication – Chapter 4
Think about your current communication skills and how you scored in the skill assessment inventory given in class during week 1 class session. Consider skills such as your ability to express yourself clearly, interpret others’ messages correctly, think before you speak, express emotion appropriately – especially during conflict, being able to say “no” without feeling guilty, listen to others carefully and respectfully, etc.
Respond to the following questions. Please repeat each question in your paper before answering it.
1. What do you identify as your two most significant strengths in the area of communication? First explain what the communication strength is and illustrate each of these strengths by a specific personal example.
2.What do you identify as the two most significant areas you need to work on? Again, specifically explain why you feel these are problematic and illustrate each weakness with an example.
3. Discuss a possible cultural bias or prejudice you have. Explain what it is and how it might affect your ability to communicate effectively with those of that cultural orientation.
4. Develop three interpersonal communication goals you would like to set for yourself during this course. Identify each goal and then explain in specific, concrete, and measurable ways how you intend to begin working on each of those goals.Assignments Due for Session Four
1. Read Interpersonal Communication chapter 5.
2. Read Bridges essays in chapter 5: Empathic and Dialogic Communications and Chapter 6: Being Open with and to Other People.
3. Complete Exercise 3
4. Complete the assignments that correlate with the reading.
Session Four Documents
Read each of the assigned chapters in Interpersonal Communication and Bridges Not Walls. Then, answer the following questions with thorough explanations. Each question should, on average, take 1 – 2 pages to answer with a final page count of no more than 8 double-spaced pages. Don’t hesitate to do additional reading outside of the two texts if you need more clarity on the concepts discussed. If you do consult other works, be sure to correctly cite these sources in your reference page along with the two main texts for the course.
Interpersonal Communication – Chapter 5
This exercise is about listening and to do it properly you will have to break it into segments before you do your final write-up. In this assignment you are to observe the conversations of three groups of people without being part of the conversation yourself. One group should be all males, one group of all females and one group of mixed males and females. There should be at least three people for it to be considered a “group.” You are observing these groups to learn the following: 1. Which topics seem to dominate the conversation of each group? Do you see any patterns? 2. How well do the people in each of those groups actually listen to one another? In what ways is effective listening being evidenced or ignored in these groups? 3. If you were to tell
these groups (which you are not) how they could improve their listening skills, explain at least three ways they could enhance their interaction through effective listening.
Bridges Not Walls – Chapter 5 – Empathic and Dialogic Listening
This essay discusses the use of empathy, and this exercise will give you an opportunity to apply what you’ve read. Your task is to strike up a 10–15-minute conversation with a person you do not know and practice the three encouraging skills mentioned in the essay (say more, mirroring, and asking clarifying questions). You do not have to talk about deep issues to practice these skills. After you have the conversation, respond to the following questions:
1. How difficult was it to initiate a conversation with a stranger knowing that you were intentionally going to use the conversation for practice?
2. Provide a critique of how well you were able to use the three skills.
3. What would you do differently if you could have the conversation with that same person
again? Be detailed in your responses.
Bridges Not Walls – Chapter 6 – Being Open with and to Other People
This essay focuses on self-disclosure. Most people enjoy talking about themselves, but all self-disclosure is not the same. Respond to the following questions:
1. Why does self-disclosure ideally need to be reciprocal in the early stages of a relationship? What might happen if it is not reciprocal? Give an example from our own life.
2. When is it appropriate, if ever, for self-disclosure to be one-sided?
3. How do you interpret the situation when a person self-discloses too much information too soon in a relationship? How do you feel being on the receiving end of this sensitive information? 4. What is the proper balance between letting someone get to know you
through ongoing self-disclosure and having a private life?
5. Do you feel more comfortable in self-disclosure with God than you do in your personal relationships or vice versa? Be detailed in your responses.
Session Five Overview
Assignments Due for Session Five
1. Read Interpersonal Communication chapter 6.
2. Read Bridges essays in chapters 4: What are the Functions of Nonverbal Communication?
3. Complete the assignments that correlate with the reading.
Session Five Documents
Read each of the assigned chapters in Interpersonal Communication and Bridges Not Walls. Then, answer the following questions with thorough explanations. Each question should, on average, take 1 – 2 pages to answer with a final page count of no more than 8 double-spaced pages. Don’t hesitate to do additional reading outside of the two texts if you need more clarity on the concepts discussed. If you do consult other works, be sure to correctly cite these sources in your reference page along with the two main texts for the course.
Interpersonal Communication – Chapter 6
In this exercise, you are going to explore how we use verbal language. When we have a message to convey to someone, it’s easy to focus so much on what we intend to say that we forget to work hard to make sure we say it in a way that the receiver can understand. On pages 164-173 of the text, there is a discussion of six different ways we create communication barriers in our attempt to be understood. For this assignment, first provide an accurate definition of each of these six language barriers (bypassing, lack of clarity, allness language, static evaluation, either/or polarization, and biased language) and then provide an example of how these might happen. Come up with your own examples and do not use the ones mentioned in the text. Then after each example, explain how you might correct each barrier once you realized it. Do this for each barrier.
Bridges Not Wall – Chapter 4 – What are the Functions of Nonverbal Communication?
Nonverbal communications that help control the interaction between people are known as regulators. For example, when you want to break into a conversation, you may use a preliminary gesture such as leaning forward or tilting your head forward to indicate your intention. This essay talks about different ways regulators
are used in daily life to indicate to others how you want them to behave or what you want them to do. For this assignment, identify three specific ways that we commonly use regulators (come up with ones not mentioned in the essay) and explain how each regulator is employed, under what conditions and the desired effect. Create a paragraph of explanation for each regulator.Assignments Due for Session Six
1. Read Interpersonal Communication chapters 7-8
2. Read Bridges essays in chapter 9: Defensive Communication.
3. Complete the assignments that correlate with the reading.
Session Six Documents
Read each of the assigned chapters in Interpersonal Communication and Bridges Not Walls. Then, answer the following questions with thorough explanations. Each question should, on average, take 1 – 2 pages to answer with a final page count of no more than 8 double-spaced pages. Don’t hesitate to do additional reading outside of the two texts if you need more clarity on the concepts discussed. If you do consult other works, be sure to correctly cite these sources in your reference page along with the two main texts for the course.
Session Six Documents
Read each of the assigned chapters in Interpersonal Communication and Bridges Not Walls. Then, answer the following questions with thorough explanations. Each question should, on average, take 1 – 2 pages to answer with a final page count of no more than 8 double-spaced pages. Don’t hesitate to do additional reading outside of the two texts if you need more clarity on the concepts discussed. If you do consult other works, be sure to correctly cite these sources in your reference page along with the two main texts for the course.
Interpersonal Communication – Chapter 7
In this exercise, you will observe and record nonverbal behavior. You will need to go to a public place such as a food court, restaurant, coffee shop, etc. where you can observe people conversing from a distance without being part of the conversation. Preferably find a couple of people who are interacting with each other, but no more than four in the group. Position yourself so that you can watch and record their nonverbal behavior without being noticed. Make note of the following nonverbal behaviors for each person: gestures, eye contact, facial
expressions, space between them, touch. Record your observations for at least 15 minutes. Then write up your responses to the following questions:
1. Which of the five types of nonverbal signals was most often used in the dialogue? Explain how they were used.
2. Just on the basis of what you observed nonverbally, did the people
you were observing seem to be correctly responding to each other’s signals or did responses seem haphazard and marked by miscues? 3. What have you learned about nonverbal communication as a result of this exercise?
4. What principles of nonverbal communication might you be more aware of in your own communication as a
result of this exercise? Be detailed in your responses.
Interpersonal Communication – Chapter 8
In this assignment you are to think of an interpersonal conflict that you’ve recently had with someone. It could be a family member, coworker, friend, or acquaintance. Using the three categories of conflict mentioned in the text (pseudo conflict, simple conflict, and ego conflict) decide which of these three types of conflict best characterizes the conflict you recently experienced and answer the following questions:
1. Briefly explain the situation where you were in conflict with this person and identify which type of conflict best describes the situation.
2. What were the prior conditions that led to the conflict?
3. What caused the conflict to move from frustration or irritation to active conflict? 4. What conflict management skills did you use (or intend to use if the conflict is not yet resolved) to manage the emotion or the problem?
Bridges Not Walls – Chapter 9 – Defensive Communication
For this assignment, you will explore the common tendency we all have to defend ourselves when we feel threatened or misunderstood by others, especially those closest to us (spouse, significant other, family member).
The essay mentions six categories of defensive strategies (evaluation, control, strategy, neutrality, superiority, certainty) that we are most likely to use. After reading the essay, respond to the following questions:
1. Which defensive approach(es) are you most likely to use when you feel threatened or misunderstood by someone you are close to? How does that defensiveness specifically show in your behavior, nonverbal communication and
verbal language? Give a real-life example.
2. Which categories of supportive behavior (description, problem
orientation, spontaneity, empathy, equality or provisionalism) do you or would you like to employ when you find yourself in a defensive posture? Give an example of how you have or would like to use this supportive type of communication and explain how it might ease the defensive posture.
Begin to work on The Applied Paper due at the end of the semester.Assignments Due for Session Seven
1. Read Interpersonal Communication chapter 11.
2. Read Bridges essays in chapters 8: Communicating Closeness: Intimacy, Affection, and Social
Support
3. Complete the assignments that correlate with the reading.
Session Six Documents
Read each of the assigned chapters in Interpersonal Communication and Bridges Not Walls. Then, answer the following questions with thorough explanations. Each question should, on average, take 1 – 2 pages to answer with a final page count of no more than 8 double-spaced pages. Don’t hesitate to do additional reading outside of the two texts if you need more clarity on the concepts discussed. If you do consult other works, be sure to correctly cite these sources in your reference page along with the two main texts for the course.
Session Seven Documents
Read each of the assigned chapters in Interpersonal Communication and Bridges Not Walls. Then, answer the following questions with thorough explanations. Each question should, on average, take 1 – 2 pages to answer with a final page count of no more than 8 double-spaced pages. Don’t hesitate to do additional reading outside of the two texts if you need more clarity on the concepts discussed. If you do consult other works, be sure to correctly cite these sources in your reference page along with the two main texts for the course.
Interpersonal Communication – Chapter 11
In this chapter, Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love is of special interest because of how it discusses three dimensions of love (intimacy, commitment and passion). In this assignment you are to critique Sternberg’s theory in light of a biblical perspective of love.
1. What similarities do you see between Sternberg’s theory and a biblical model of love?
2. What differences do you see between Sternberg’s theory and a biblical model of love?
3. If you were counseling a couple in premarital sessions about the most important characteristics for keeping their marriage strong and vital, what would you tell them? Be specific and detailed in your responses.
Bridges Not Walls – Chapter 8 – Communicating Closeness: Intimacy, Affection, and Social Support
In this essay, the authors contrast intimacy and sexual involvement because they don’t see them as being necessarily the same thing. After reading the essay, do some of your own critical thinking on the following questions:
1. What do you see as the primary differences between emotional intimacy and sexual intimacy? What similarities might there be?
2. Can you have emotional intimacy without sexual engagement? If so, how
do you go about developing emotional intimacy? In other words, what are the main components of emotional intimacy and how do you maintain it over time?
3. What type of interaction helps to develop “depth” in intimate
interactions that you want to last? Be specific about the topics or behaviors.
Continue to work on The Applied Paper due at the end of the semester.Assignments Due for Session Eight
1. Read Interpersonal Communication chapter 12.
2. Read Bridges essays in chapter 7: Separating Messages from Metamessages in Family Talk.
3. Complete the assignments that correlate with the reading.
Session Eight Documents
Read each of the assigned chapters in Interpersonal Communication and Bridges Not Walls. Then, answer the following questions with thorough explanations. Each question should, on average, take 1 – 2 pages to answer with a final page count of no more than 8 double-spaced pages. Don’t hesitate to do additional reading outside of the two texts if you need more clarity on the concepts discussed. If you do consult other works, be sure to correctly cite these sources in your reference page along with the two main texts for the course.
Session Eight Documents
Read each of the assigned chapters in Interpersonal Communication and Bridges Not Walls. Then, answer the following questions with thorough explanations. Each question should, on average, take 1 – 2 pages to answer with a final page count of no more than 8 double-spaced pages. Don’t hesitate to do additional reading outside of the two texts if you need more clarity on the concepts discussed. If you do consult other works, be sure to correctly cite these sources in your reference page along with the two main texts for the course.
Interpersonal Communication – Chapter 12
In this assignment you will interact with the four models of family communication patterns that are discussed in the text (see page 354). After reading about the four models, create a scenario that illustrates each of the models.
Create a paragraph for each model showing how communication between members of the family would look. In a fifth and final paragraph, critique the four models and explain which of the four most closely represents a biblical model of a healthy family dynamic. Explain your rationale in detail.
Bridges Not Walls – Chapter 7 – Separating Messages from Metamessages in Family Talk
This essay highlights the interesting concept of metamessages, or how we go about discussing a given topic. After reading the essay, create a scenario where a husband and wife are discussing a rather benign topic that gets tangled because the communication is unclear. Then, show how they untangle the problem by moving from discussing the problem to using metamessages to talk about HOW they are discussing the problem. In your scenario, show how the metamessage allows them to better understand each other and resolve the initial misunderstanding. Create this scenario by using dialogue and preface each comment by indicating which person
is speaking.
For example: Jane: I don’t see your point.
Tom: I’ve already made my point very clear…”
In the final paragraph, explain your scenario and discuss how you are using metamessages to illustrate your point.
Continue to work on The Applied Paper due at the end of the semester
