Six discussion questions. The textbook used is Family Therapy: An Overview by Goldenberg, I., DeFrain, J., Stanton, M., & Goldenberg, H. (2017). Family therapy: An overview (9th ed.). Cengage Learning. ISBN-13: 9781305092969 A substantive post is 100 words minimum, incorporates information from the course materials/readings or personal experience, and adds something new to the conversation that others can learn from.
DQ1: In many cultures, the eldest child plays a significant role in the family, acting as a secondary parental figure to their younger siblings. Typically, this is due to their age and the experience they’ve gained over the years. They are usually seen as more responsible and capable of handling challenging tasks. This responsibility often extends to taking over family matters, such as a family business, when the parents can no longer do so. It’s a tradition passed down through generations and is prevalent in many societies today. Each person has a role they play in the family. Do you think it is acceptable for a child to play multiple roles? For example, a secondary parental figure or should a child have the freedom to “just be a kid”? Unfortunately, when I was raising my children, I was a single mom when they were younger, and everyone had to pitch in to help with things.
DQ2: Jamila, in many families the oldest sibling becomes the “parent” to the younger ones, and that is not necessarily a good thing:
https://www.parents.com/parenting/better-parenting/i-parented-my-sibling-as-a-child-and-heres-how-it-changed-my-life/
DQ3: When thinking about members of my extended family and their marriages, I have realized there is a pattern. It seems like the younger siblings end up marrying the older sibling of the other family and vice versa, the older sibling from one family usually ends up marrying the youngest from a different family. Whereas, middle children specialize in making great friendships(Leman,2015). Apparently, birth order may influence marital selection based on the idea that the family role creates a certain type of personality.
Leman, Kevin (2015) Focus On The Family, “How Birth Order Affects Your Marriage”, https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/how-birth-order-affects-your-marriage/
What position are you in your siblings?
DQ4: Do you think that a family where there are only female children have a different experience of birth order – like maybe ability is considered more than birth order when it comes to roles in the family, something like that?
DQ5: It is different in many cultures because society has different expectations from different genders. For example, I have noticed in many hispanic families women are expected to be a housewife meaning they are expected to cook, clean and raise the children. Even Though she might work she is still expected to carry out these roles. Moreover, the male is supposed to be the protector of his family just like his father. They’re meant to provide for the family and carry our chores that require heavy lifting. Personally, I have seen roles recycled when older relatives move out. Both men and women learn how to carry out the roles that are expected from them. These roles may be influenced by the amount of siblings that are in a family. They will normally be recycled when the oldest sibling may be occupied.
What is your birth order? Do you think your family fits birth order rules?
DQ6: I wonder if marriage is deeper than birth order but psychological as well. My mother married older men in both her marriages. My father, her first husband was 20 years her senior. My stepfather 10 years her senior. I wonder when women do it, if it is done as a way of feeling protected. It’s strange. A woman who does this is seen as a “cougar”, yet for a man it is seen as “robbing the cradle”.
